au pair

What if your kids don't accept the Au Pair?

by Sammy-Jo on Jul 23, 2019
What if your kids don't accept the Au Pair?
You're doing the best you can to be a good parent. But sometimes, life gets in the way and you find yourself needing an extra pair of hands in your daily life. After a thorough research you decided to host an Au Pair. You interviewed candidates and finally found your perfect match. Or so you thought. Unfortunately, your kids don’t seem to be too accepting of the Au Pair. So, what can you as the Host Family do? Read on to find out. 

The first Au Pair

If it’s your first Au Pair, chances are that your kids simply don’t understand the situation. Why is there a strange person in your house taking them to school when all these years their parents drove them? Adapting to a new situation is always hard, so sit down with your children and explain the Au Pair program to them. They might even be scared to lose you, since a lot of the tasks you used to take on are now part of the Au Pair’s job. Tell them that you will always be there for them, but they now also have an additional big sibling. This way they know they won’t lose anything, but instead gain a new family member.

The Au Pairs after

It took some time, but your kids finally welcomed the Au Pair into their hearts. Sadly, a year can go by way too fast and now it’s time to say goodbye. You had a great time together, which is why you decided to take part in the Au Pair program again. Your new Au Pair arrives, but no matter how fun and upbeat they seem, your kids keep their distance. Why? 
They are very likely to miss their old Au Pair. The reason they don’t seem to like the new Au Pair might be because they miss the old one. Give your kids time. They are still sad their big sibling had to leave and are not ready to replace them just like that. Include your new Au Pair in as many family activities as possible. Your kids might be able to get used to them faster. However, try not to forbid them to talk about your old Au Pair. Even though they are not around anymore, they are still a very important part of your children’s lives. 

From an Au Pair’s point of view, I can confirm that the old Au Pair’s name will be dropped a lot of times during the first few weeks. But that doesn’t mean they don’t like you. All it means is that they miss one of their best friends and talking about them is their way to keep them close. It’s actually pretty sweet if you think about it. And knowing that they will probably talk about you in the same way when you’re gone is a nice thought, too. 
To conclude, what should you do if your kids don’t accept your Au Pair? Talk to them, give them time and most importantly: respect their feelings. Your kids are smart, I’m sure they will see the great person your Au Pair is soon enough.

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