Asian Family: Finding and Hiring a Foreign Au Pair

by Lee on Jan 21, 2025
Asian Family: Finding and Hiring a Foreign Au Pair

We have noticed a growing trend of Asian families seeking foreign Au Pairs to enrich their households with childcare and cultural exchange. However, many families face challenges due to cultural differences and unclear expectations. This article aims to help by providing practical steps to find, hire, and prepare for a suitable Au Pair, ensuring a smooth and rewarding experience for both the family and the Au Pair.

1. How to Find a Foreign Au Pair

Finding the right Au Pair is an important step in creating a successful cultural exchange experience. While this guide is focused on Asian families, the advice can apply to families anywhere. It’s also important to note that not every Asian family faces the same challenges—these tips aim to address common patterns we’ve observed.

For example, some families might approach the process too formally, treating profiles like job postings or prioritizing qualifications over personality. Others might struggle with offering the personal space an Au Pair needs. Addressing these habits can make the search smoother and more enjoyable:

Understand Cultural Dynamics in the Process

In many Asian families, the search for an Au Pair can feel like a formal recruitment process. While having a structure is helpful, adding a personal touch to your family profile makes it more inviting. Instead of listing tasks and schedules, describe your family’s lifestyle and how the Au Pair can become a part of it:

"We are a family of four who love exploring new foods and spending time outdoors. We’d love for you to share your culture with us and help with our children’s morning routines."

Highlight Personality

While qualifications are important, an adaptable and enthusiastic Au Pair is often a better fit for family life. Share friendly photos that reflect your family’s warmth, such as enjoying meals or playing together. Highlight cultural traditions or festivals to attract candidates eager to embrace your way of life.

Set Realistic Language Expectations

It’s important to remember that an Au Pair isn’t a tutor. While they can naturally expose your children to a new language through conversations and activities, they are not obligated to provide formal language lessons or academic teaching. Their primary role is childcare and cultural exchange. Focus on finding someone who can engage with your family in a supportive and friendly way.

Avoid Being Too Formal or Rigid

Sometimes, profiles can unintentionally feel intimidating. Keep the language conversational and ensure your expectations are realistic. Be clear about shared spaces but emphasize that the Au Pair will have personal privacy and downtime.

2. How to Hire the Right Au Pair

Make Your Online Connection Stable

For many families, meeting the Au Pair in person isn’t possible until they arrive, so focus on building a good connection during online conversations. Video calls are crucial for two reasons. First, they help ensure that the person you're talking to is reliable (remember, AuPair.com is not a full-service agency; read more about that here). Second, they are especially helpful for understanding communication styles, discussing expectations, and even introducing the Au Pair to your children.

Treat the Interview as a Conversation

Interviews are a chance to connect with the Au Pair and learn about their personality. Avoid a rigid, formal approach and ask open-ended questions like:

  • “What do you enjoy most about caring for children?”
  • “How do you approach cultural differences when living with a family?”
This relaxed style helps both sides feel comfortable and builds trust early on. Also, don’t let language be a barrier! Feeling confident to make your points sound and clear can help a lot with the process.

Be Clear About Routines and Expectations

Asian families often have structured routines or cultural habits that may differ from what the Au Pair expects. For example, food and accommodation might be the two biggest differences.

Meals in Asian households are often a key part of family bonding, with shared mealtimes being a central tradition. This might feel unfamiliar to Au Pairs from cultures where meals are often more independent. 

Asian cuisines can also differ significantly from what the Au Pair is used to. Traditional dishes, ingredients, and flavors might be new to them, and it’s important to introduce these gradually. At the same time, some Au Pairs might have specific dietary needs (e.g., vegetarian, gluten-free), which are less common in some parts of Asia. 

Living arrangements can also be quite different. Asian families often live in multi-generational homes or have closer living arrangements compared to families in other regions. While this dynamic can feel warm and lively, it’s essential to ensure the Au Pair has their own private space where they can relax and recharge. 

Cultural norms, such as removing shoes indoors or specific guest policies, might also feel new to Au Pairs. Explaining these customs kindly helps them adapt. If the household includes shared spaces or multiple generations, assure the Au Pair that their privacy will be respected.

By discussing these differences openly and with flexibility, families can create an environment where their Au Pair feels welcome and respected while preserving the unique traditions that make the family special.

3. How to Prepare for the Au Pair’s Arrival

Transportation and First Impressions

In many Asian families, a warm welcome reflects hospitality and care. Personally picking up your Au Pair from the airport or train station is often seen as a thoughtful gesture, setting the tone for their stay. If you can’t pick them up yourself, arrange reliable transportation and provide detailed instructions, such as the driver’s contact information and pickup details. In many Asian cities, navigating public transport or language barriers can be challenging for newcomers, so offering extra guidance ensures a smooth arrival and makes your Au Pair feel truly welcomed.

Introduce Your Culture Gradually

Sharing your family’s traditions can be a wonderful part of the experience, but avoid overwhelming the Au Pair. Start by explaining daily routines, meal etiquette, and house rules, and allow time for adjustment.

Help Them Settle Into the Neighborhood

Take your Au Pair on a quick tour of your neighborhood. Show them nearby grocery stores, parks, and public transport options. A small welcome guide with tips about your city can also help them feel more at home.

You can also find detailed arrival preparation guidelines here.

Final Thoughts

For Asian families, creating a welcoming environment that balances cultural values with open communication is key to a successful and enriching experience. We hope this guide provides clarity and confidence as you navigate the process of finding, hiring, and preparing for a foreign Au Pair. By setting clear expectations, focusing on mutual understanding, and approaching the journey with warmth and flexibility, you can build a meaningful partnership that benefits both your family and your Au Pair. 
Wishing you a smooth and rewarding journey!


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