Why do Au Pairs and Host Families not respond?

Challenges in finding the right match

When searching for the right match, both candidates and Host Families might encounter some challenges. One of the most common struggles is the lack of response from other users. 

Although members on our platform are checked daily, we are only an online matching agency and therefore we are unable to interview all of them. Every online agency complies with the same rules as the whole Internet community - to be sure you are in touch with a real person you need to speak with them in a video call and ask about all the details.

Spotting scammers

Our team checks the database daily, looking for all the people who can in any case be unreliable. We can also provide you with a bunch of tips on how to spot a scammer. 

• Visible contact information: If a user makes their email address or phone number visible to contact them directly, and then deletes their profile on AuPair.com after you contact them, this is a red flag. This way, we can't find them and warn other users.
• Unusually high pocket money: Be cautious if a user offers very high pocket money. No one pays more than necessary.
• Referrals to third parties: If a user refers you to a travel agent or another third person willing to help you, it's likely a fraud attempt. Never contact any so-called agency offering to help with visas and paperwork.
• Requests for money: Never send any money abroad to any user in advance.
• Refusal to video call: If a user refuses to arrange a Skype video call, this is a significant warning sign.

Click here to read our article on how to spot a scammer. If you ever feel uneasy, keep us updated - we will do our best to help!

We also recommend that you do not disclose your private contacts to the other party right away. Instead, exchange a few messages on the platform first. Once you have gotten to know the other person and established mutual interest, you can move the conversation to external channels. Click here to learn how our internal messaging system works.

Why do users not answer

When sending out free message requests to candidates on the platform, or even personalized messages, some users might not answer you. This could happen for many reasons. 

In particular, if you are a Host Family looking for an Au Pair, you should keep in mind that Au Pairs with experience in childcare - especially English native speakers - receive dozens of messages per day. Keeping track of all the message requests and answering all of them could be overwhelming.   

Enhancing your profile

One way to increase the likelihood of getting responses is by improving your profile. Here are some tips to make your profile more appealing: 

1. Pictures: High-quality and friendly photos can make a big difference. Ensure that your pictures are clear, recent, and depict your family or yourself in a welcoming manner. Avoid overly staged or formal photos; instead, aim for images that showcase your personality and environment.
2. Letters: A well-written letter can provide a more personal touch. Introduce yourself, your family, your lifestyle, and what you are looking for in an Au Pair. Make sure to highlight what makes your family unique and why an Au Pair would enjoy living with you.
3. Personalized messages: When reaching out to potential candidates, avoid generic messages. Instead, take the time to personalize each message. Refer to something specific in their profile that caught your attention and explain why you think they would be a good fit for your family.
4. Add favorite users to your hotlist: Utilize the hotlist feature to keep track of users who interest you. This will help you organize your search and follow up with promising candidates.

Monitoring user activity

When browsing profiles, pay attention to the last login date and the answer rate of users. These metrics can provide insights into how active and responsive a user is.

• Last login: A recent login indicates that the user is currently active on the platform and more likely to respond to messages.
• Answer rate: A high answer rate suggests that the user is diligent about responding to messages, increasing your chances of receiving a reply.

Tips for better communication

For Au Pairs:

1. Always answer all messages: Even if you are not interested in a particular Host Family, it’s polite to respond. A simple, courteous message can go a long way.
2. Respond promptly: If you send a family a contact request and get a positive answer, it is your turn now to take the initiative to send them a few personal lines. This shows your genuine interest and keeps the communication flowing.
3. Be open: If you are unsure whether a family is the right fit for you, communicate this openly. Take the opportunity to get to know the family better before making a final decision, preferably through a phone call or video meeting.
4. Meet the family in a video call: Not only meeting the family in a video call will help you understand if you’re talking to someone reliable or not - it is also the best way to start building a relationship with your future hosts. Schedule several meetings to ask all your questions about your stay and discuss the details of your contract together. 

For Host Families:

1. Be active: Regularly check your messages and stay engaged with potential candidates. Prompt communication shows that you are serious and committed.
2. Remind Au Pairs once: If an Au Pair hasn’t responded, it’s okay to send a polite reminder. However, if there is still no response, it’s best to move on and explore other options.
3. Be flexible: Sometimes the perfect match might not meet all your criteria. Be open to adjusting your expectations and consider candidates who might not fit your initial checklist but have other valuable qualities.